Author: swanksalot

Harley Farger, a leading Delaware masturbator and planner of the Million Masturbators March, said it was difficult to organize masturbators “because they’re used to acting alone.”

Mr. Farger, the executive director of the pro-monkey-spanking group MasturNation, said that the “wank and file” of his organization believe that masturbation is an inalienable right guaranteed by the Constitution.

“Our country was founded by rugged individualists,” he said. “And you know what individualists like to do.”

He said that Ms. O’Donnell’s anti-whacking position was “ill-timed,” adding, “In this economy, masturbation is one of the few simple pleasures people still can afford.”

That’s not true, I do feel guilty. I feel like I’m stepping on people’s lives, disrespecting their suffering by spending $2.00 on an energy boost. In the North Kivu region of Lubero where I live, most people make $15.00 to $20.00 a month and have more than five children to feed and educate. Many people don’t make any money at all, and whatever small income is generated is often stolen by soldiers, along with houses, food, animals and hope. I

In the meantime, Katz, who opened the bar that goes with his deli on Nov. 15, 1979, is going to throw a Hall of Fame (and Hall of Shame) reunion for his faithful customers Thursday at his restaurant at 618 W. Sixth. The invites include photos of famous people who have allegedly visited his place: among them Woody Allen, Dennis Hopper and, uh, the Queen of England?

O Beloved, upon this river of wine, launch our boat-shaped cup,
And into this river throw those weeping with envy, too.

This Leica MP2 camera and matching Wetzlar electric motor are going up for auction at WestLicht Auction in December of this year. The starting price for this auction is €80,000 (~$105,000), and the camera is expected to fetch up to €180,000 (~$235,440).

Teabagger and Senate candidate in Alaska, Joe Miller’s misguided intellectual and philosophical purity about how we shouldn’t rely on the federal government for anything did not keep him from making a little extra cash on the side thanks to you the taxpayer. That’s right, Mr. ’Who Needs the Feds?’ collected more than $14,000 in federal farm subsidies between 1995 and 2003, including barley and conservation subsidies.…but he’s perfectly happy to reap the rewards of a system he claims to detest, and then wants to get rid of it for everyone else.

Kind of like the fact that his parents live on Social Security and Medicare, but he wants to cut it off for the generations to come. Or the fact that his kids are home schooled and he wants to abolish the Department of Education.

This is an image of tequila under a microscope with 1000x magnification. Unclear whether this is well tequila or god's piss. Time magazine has more micrographs of libations. "What Booze Looks Like Under A Microscope"

I was detained last night by federal authorities at San Francisco International Airport for refusing to answer questions about why I had travelled outside the United States.

The end result is that, after waiting for about half an hour and refusing to answer further questions, I was released – because U.S. citizens who have produced proof of citizenship and a written customs declaration are not obligated to answer questions.

A federal judge in Puerto Rico – a territory sensitive to the rights and privileges of its residents' U.S. citizenship — said it best: "The only absolute and unqualified right of citizenship is to residence within the territorial boundaries of the United States; a citizen cannot be either deported or denied reentry." U.S. v. Valentine, 288 F. Supp. 957, 980 (D.P.R. 1968).

So, while some commenters worried – or advocated – that a citizen who refused to answer CBP questions would be denied re-entry to the United States, the U.S. government does not have the power to prevent a citizen’s re-entry.

My great grandfather was the sole survivor ( last living perhaps police officer, perhaps) of the bomb tossed by Haymarket Square* anarchists. Some sixty years ago, I, as the great grandson of the sole survivor of the Haymarket Riot, Frank Tyrrell, was chosen by the Chicago Police Department to place a wreath on the statue. Thus, I was particularly offended when Bill Ayers attempted to blow up the statue not once but twice during his violent youth. I want to redeem the police. Ayers has lived on, swaddled in the respect of Liberals. I want to remind them of the many police and laboring men who were maimed in that riot that Ayers tried, in his violent past, to exploit and apparently is still proud of.

What happened when you went to New Orleans?

@BPGlobalPR: That was when I realized the severity of the situation, I'd been poking fun at BP, like poking at the beast, but when I went to New Orleans I realized: it IS a beast. Meeting guys like professor Rick Steiner, who explained how BP and oil companies in general try to weasel their way out of cleaning up their mess.

For instance: the dispersant. The dispersant is criminal. It just created plumes of underwater oil and cleaned up the huge slicks on surface. They just put everything underwater, and actively made the problem worse. I realized how tied up the government is on all this–the MMS, the EPA. I don’t trust a thing those guys say. I was really disappointed when the White House said that there was only 26 percent of the oil remaining in the Gulf, because that’s just not true. This is a big problem.

Roky and the 13th Floor Elevators cast a huge shadow over the TX music scene, all over Texas but especially in Austin. In their music and their personalities, they really captured something very specifically Austin, this sort of combination of the redneck rebel thing from rural Texas, the esoteric intellectual element from the crackpot fringe around the University of Texas, and that sort of drug-culture philosophy that Austin has picked up from being a town that a lot of contraband was smuggled through. In a lot of ways, I think those three elements have always defined Austin counterculture, and the Elevators are kind of the apotheosis of that. Over the course of his career, Roky dabbled in – and influenced – psych and garage rock, metal, blues-rock, the Texas songwriter movement of people like Townes Van Zandt (who was briefly his roommate), and "outsider music"